When I get punched in the gut emotionally, there are several things I need to have or need to do.

If it is my heart that is breaking, I will usually find a quiet spot and cry it out, then when that is over, I will write it out. that is cathartic for me. When my heart breaks, it is a bad thing. Fortunately that is not where I am right now.

If it is something else that gets to me, I need to be held and comforted. Feel that I am worthy or that the fight is worth while or that everything will be ok. This is the tiny dark place I am in.

I am helpless for the most part to solve the issue in front of me. I am devestated to see my mom in the state she is in. I am torn between anger and tears as this is where she seems to want to be.

I cannot seem to formulate my exact needs without fearing that I am coming across as attacking those I love. Or making them feel as if they are at fault for not being able to help me. I need to loosen my expectations a bit and just let the stuff happen as it will/can.

My beautiful fairy fae was so hurt when she heard grandma fell. She wanted to hug her. I fear she would have been terrified had she seen her yesterday. But I know in my heart what she would have done was grimace and say, I am sorry Grandma and try to hug her and comfort her. Love my sprite.

My BFF is trying to help, but she is 2000 miles away. Hard to hug through those miles! And my Irish, man of my soul, love of mine..bad time for him at work and elsewhere. He is trying and I love him for it.
Crappy timing is all

I just wish....lots of wishes here......

Ok, I am off to my garage to pack up stuff so that I can possibly have a yard sale this weekend